As for his children's phones, the former security head of Facebook Alex Stamos has a simple philosophy: “Trust but check.”
While schools introduce bans on the use of phones and apply a locking case, parents are still struggling with how much internet access their children should have. Stamos saw his “terrible dark side” up close, working in high positions related to security both in Yahoo and in Facebook.
Based on his experience, he presented eight rules for the use of phones by children – seven of them in the “Tosh Show” podca, which he developed especially for Business Insider. And he presented one additional one in the email to us.
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The first question is: when should a child get a phone at all? Stamos's 13-year-old daughter has a phone call and, as he said, “there was no way to prevent it.”
“She got it at the age of 13, it was her border,” Daniel Tosh told the host of Podcast. – Hold back with giving the phone until the children are ready to have it He added.
The smartphone does not have to compare the internet
In the Business Insider email Stamos wrote that “many children have devices before the age of 13” and that “it depends on every parent.”
“iPads or other tablets can be blocked so that only approved applications work, and It is important not to open a web browser until the child is older, because then you lose control over what he has access to “ He pointed out.
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Watch your child's habits
When the children already have a phone, parents should carefully observe their technological habits, said Stamos in the podcast. His two rules regarding supervision are: Parents should always know the child's phone password and carry out unannounced checks.
“You can tell your child at any time:” Give me your phone, “said a former Facebook employee. “If they ever refuse, the phone is lost,” he noted.
Stamos said that such a “threat” makes children know that they would have to share the content of the phone. Tells his children that It's not about what they do on the internet, but about what other “bad people” can do them.
Screen activity control
Americans use various tricks to escape endless content. Some even go to buy “stupid phones” or invest in wired landdown.
Stamos's solution is simpler: Children should use the built -in screening time control settings and must postpone the phones at night.
Night without a smartphone
This night time, he noted, is also a great time to carry out an unannounced control. “Teens don't sleep because they have telephones all night and write messages all night,” Stamos said.
In the email he added that Night sending messages “causes all kinds of social and educational problems”.
Social media in its time
Worried parents often notice that The bosses of technology companies themselves limit their children access to technology. CEO Meta Mark Zuckerberg covers the faces of his children in the pictures on social media and in 2019 said that he did not want “sitting long in front of the TV or computer”. Google Sundar Pichai in 2018 said that his 11-year-old son did not have a phone at the time.
Stamos is no exception – in the podcast he said that his principle is: Children should not have social media, “until they are ready.” Once they are, their profiles should be set as private.
The leader Daniel Tosh said that social media must be “at the outlet”, which Stamos agreed to, pointing to the preferences of younger generations.
– Young people are much more interested in private communication With each other – said Stamos. – I think it is a very positive aspect and it comes from the children themselves.
The child should talk about everything that worries them
The last rule of Stamos is to promote the culture of openness. He said that some of the worst behavior on the Internet take place when bad people convince children that they cannot admit their parents to mistakes made online.
– Predators know that if they manage to put the child to make a mistake, they can then create a situation: me and you against your parents – said Stamos. – They are very good at it. I saw these transcripts.
Stamos said that Parents must “instill” children against such behavior, telling them: “If someone tells you to not tell us something, because we are angry – he is lying.”
“It is important that children understand that you will not blame them for the actions of others, especially adults, and that all mistakes they will make will be forgiven,” wrote Stamos in the email to Business Insider.
Additional option at Apple
Stamos shared one more advice with us.
“When it comes to technical control, it is important to enable the” Communication Safety “Apple option because it blocks sending and receiving naked photos” – he wrote, adding that children over 13 years of age can “unfortunately” bypass this function.
The above text is a translation with American Business Insider edition
