Remember: if you suffer from eating disorders or are in a toxic relationship, do not be afraid to ask for help and use the support of a doctor or specialist.
Liana Winokurowa is 18 years old and lives in Yakut. Already at school she began to worry about her figure. Until the age of 14, she cultivated athletics and was a cheerleader, but then because of the injury she abandoned sport and gained a bit of weight. “My mother always had a tendency to gain weight, and after delivery she rapidly gained weight,” says Liana. – But then she lost weight from XL to XS. Compared to me, she began to look very fine – he reports. My mother said Lianie: “I am a woman who gave birth to children and I managed to lose weight. You are young, you can also do it easily.”
Liana organizes events. A year ago, during one of the projects she met a young man who she liked. “We talked a lot while working, we approached each other,” he says. – I knew he was still changing the girls. But despite this I started to meet him: I thought maybe something would change.
At the beginning Kostia (changed name) seemed very caring to her. Every evening he asked what he wanted to dinner and ordered food. It was often pizza, burgers or sushi. – I started to gain weight. When I get fat, my breasts and buttocks are growing first – says Liana. – He said he liked it. He put more food for me and called me “his treasure” – he adds. Kostia claimed that her “figure is getting better”.
– I liked it. Earlier I was still on diets. And then it seemed to me that I met a man who likes me as I was – recalls Liana.
“End of the world”
After a few months, conflicts began to be born between Liana and Kostia, they were arguing about trifles. The man did not want to clean and said that “this is a woman's task.” Liana did not understand what was going on – she seemed to announce nothing. – I thought: maybe he has someone else? – he says. I couldn't stand it and looked into his phone. It turned out that I was right – He cheated on me with my friend.
She decided not to say anything – it seemed to her that if she improved something in her, she would be nice and understanding, her partner would remember. “But once at the party I drank a lot of alcohol and went to my sister for the night,” he says. – And Kostia suddenly said that I was cheating on him. And with your own sister. It sounded completely absurd, I thought he was crazy. Of course, we parted after that.
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A few months later, Liana met Kostia at a party outside the city. That evening they both drank a lot, and he said he had to talk to her. – He said he didn't want to part with me, he just had his reasons. At this point, I did not want to meet him anymore, we decided that we would become friends – recalls a young woman.
Ultimately, however, Liana asked what was the reason for their parting. She heard: “You don't have a very attractive figure, you don't excite me”. It turned out that when Liana began to gain weight, not only her breasts increased, but also “fat on her stomach” appeared, which her boyfriend did not like.
– When I heard this, I felt like the end of the world came. I decided that I was fat. I was so sorry: when we started to meet, I was small, slim. And now it seemed to me that I turned into a fat man. And he fed me – says Liana.
New beginning
Liana completely ceased to like her appearance, she was depressed for several months, she even thought about suicide. She went to a psychiatrist, who diagnosed with her depressive disorders and prescribed medicine.
Alona Sinohina / Shutterstock
A toxic relationship can affect our relationship with our own body, an illustrative photo
“I felt better,” he recalls. – But it wasn't the end of problems. At the beginning of the year I started to meet with another boy. I was still ashamed of my figure, I didn't show him naked in the light – he adds. The new partner said Liania that her body is beautiful and that it is important to him that she feels comfortable.
“But then he saw my old photos and began to say something completely different,” the woman recalls. He asked: “You were so thin, which bothers you to lose weight again,” he adds. The relationship lasted about a month. The new boy still proposed Liana playing sports, advised various diets and even “Week of drinking water”. He said: “We agreed that you would start to lose weight.” “I told him that I would not starve myself, that health is more important to me,” says Liana. – Then he brought everything to a joke, he said that I treat his words too seriously.
But then he returned to this topic again. Once upon a time, Liana asked: “Why do you want me to lose weight so much?” He reacted aggressively, began to get nervous. “Do you think that I am pleased when my friends tell me that I have overweight girl?” – he said.
“We broke up at that moment,” says Liana. – I advised him to look for Barbie doll. And then I learned that he was secretly meeting my friend – but with another – he adds. Since then, Liana, as she says, began to think a lot.
She came to the conclusion that In recent years, she has devoted too much energy and nerves to men who did not want to accept her as she is. “I decided that there was nothing to hurry,” he says. “I will find a man who will love me.” And if I don't find it, I'll be alone. There is nothing terrible about it.
I’m Ashley Davis as an editor, I’m committed to upholding the highest standards of integrity and accuracy in every piece we publish. My work is driven by curiosity, a passion for truth, and a belief that journalism plays a crucial role in shaping public discourse. I strive to tell stories that not only inform but also inspire action and conversation.
