Mom, in (almost) impossible mission: “I want to offer them everything the same. I don't want to tell me when they will be adults that one has received more and the other less.”
Making differences between children can be very difficult, especially when they are different ages. Photo: Shutterstock
Sometimes I feel like there are two mothers in the same body. One for my daughter. One for my son. And between the two, a tired woman trying to keep the balance of equity in perfect balance. Not to fail, not to forget, not to miss, not to tilt more than to each other. Because I know how to grow up in a family where one of the children is the “chosen”, and the other remains only “emotional support”.
I have two children with a six -year difference between them. The girl is bigger and is almost major now. The boy, the little one, is still in that intense period, in which everything happens in maximum volume, with energy and with parental addiction. Since I was born I knew that my challenge will be equal. To be a mother for two, without anyone feeling that she is less seen, less loved, less important.
What I did not imagine is how tiring this commitment will be. How often it will mean to cook two dishes at lunch or dinner, because everyone likes something else and I can't always ask them to accept compromises. How often I will feel guilty if I buy something to one and the other receives nothing. How careful I will have to plan any gesture, any surprise, any experience, so that the two do not feel that he has invested more, more beautiful, earlier or more often in the other.
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