“Shut up, because I say so!” It's no longer a rule – it's a problem! 7 parenting rules to be rewritten

The world has changed, but many parents still apply rules with which they have grown themselves – rules that no longer correspond to the reality of children from current generations. From the fear of foreigners to the silence imposed, it is time to re -evaluate what healthy education means.

The current generations of children, raised with screens, artificial intelligence and discussions about emotional health in kindergarten, can no longer be educated with the mentality of the 80s or '90s. More and more parents realize that the rules with which they were raised – many of them based on rigid authority, shame or obedience – not only no longer work, but can harm the relationship with the child. Instead of providing protection or guide, these rules can inhibit autonomy, trust and dialogue.

Here are 7 old parenting rules that urgently need update and how they can be reinterpreted to match the world in which our children live.

1. “Do not talk to strangers.”

UPDATE: “Learn to recognize dangerous strangers and ask for help when something does not seem right.”
In the social media era and online games, total isolation is no longer realistic. What matters today is not to avoid all strangers, but education about risk, intuition and discernment. Children need to know who I can ask for help, what information should not offer online and how to identify dubious behavior.

2. “Do not interrupt an adult when he speaks.”

UPDATE: “We all deserve to be listening. Wait for the turn, but do not cancel your voice.”
This rule taught many children that their words, their ideas do not matter. But a child who does not dare to interrupt an adult risks not saying even when he is in danger. Today, we want empathetic, but also brave children – who understand when it's time to speak and that their voice is worth listening.

3. “Do not discuss what is happening in the house with strangers.”

UPDATE: “Keep the intimacy of the family, but do not be afraid to ask for help if you are scared or unhappy.”
The rule was meant to protect private life, but in many cases it has become a barrier to sincerity and reporting of abuse. Children need to know the difference between gossip and real problems. To learn that it is okay to talk to an adult of trust – teacher, counselor, therapist – when something is not right at home.

4. “Do not argue with adults.”

UPDATE: “You can support your point of view with respect – even in front of an adult.”
A world in which adults are always right produces shy, inhibited or obedient children until self -destruction. Current generations must learn to defend their ideas, emotions and limits, even in front of an authority figure. Respect does not mean total submission.

5. “The girls do not speak ugly / The boys do not cry.”

UPDATE: “We are all allowed to feel and express ourselves.”
Why don't work anymore. These gender stereotypes limit the emotional development of children. Boys learn to suppress their vulnerability, girls are learned that they must be pleasant, not sincere. A healthy education leaves room for all emotions – regardless of sex – and promotes expression, not suppression.

6. “Stay good, it's shame.”

UPDATE: “behave according to the context.”
Shame has been used as a control method, but has long -term negative effects: anxiety, toxic perfectionism, lack of initiative. Children need to understand why behavior is inappropriate and how to adapt to the situation, not to act out of fear.

7. “Shut up, because I say so.”

UPDATE: “I explain why I ask you a certain thing – and if you do not understand, ask.”
Why don't work anymore. Rigid authority cultivates fear, not trust. A child who is not learned to ask questions will not learn to think critically. The dialogue does not weaken the authority of the parent, but humanizes it. The child learns that the rules make sense, not just strength.

The children of today's generations live in a world completely different from the one in which we grew up. We cannot apply the same recipes and hope for different results.