Young people and intimate health. Doctor: “The problem is not that I can't find information, but how credible it is”
Although they have a sea of information a click away, young people feel the need to talk to well-informed adults when they have serious questions about their intimate lives.
Young people have many questions related to intimate life PHOTO: Pixabay
Sex education remains a necessity, and specialists constantly agree on this truth when negative statistics appear or when reality simply shows what its lack leads to. The subject is debated, alarm signals are raised, but things remain unchanged. The need of teenagers and young people to talk to the right people about topics that are still taboo for many adults, on the other hand, is reflected in every meeting attended by specialists. Dr. Elena Ucenic, the doctor who answers the questions asked by young people on the “Plan the Unforeseen” platform or at the face-to-face meetings with them in schools, also found this.
The platform was thought of, many years ago, as a tool through which sexual and contraceptive education can be done. At first, most of the questions were about contraception. The beach has widened a lot in recent years, and young people ask more and more diverse questions, which show on the one hand interest, and on the other hand the lack of communication on such topics with the adults around them.
“Who takes responsibility?”
The most frequent questions young people ask the doctor on the “Plan the Unforeseen” platform are related to sexual habits, contraception, relationships with partners, sexually transmitted diseases, but not only that. “Everyone has something to ask, it's not necessarily a specific topic that they're discussing. And lately I've noticed that the scope of questions is widening. It's not just about contraception, because that's how the platform was originally designed, as a sex education and contraceptive platform, and the first questions that came in were more about contraception – details about taking the pill, temporary, permanent contraception and so on.” the doctor explained.
The Internet has become, for young people, as it often happens for adults, the first source of information, and Dr. Google has been replaced by applications that use artificial intelligence, not by specialized websites. An answer quickly obtained by querying such an application brought a 17-year-old girl to Dr. Ucenic's office. The girl became pregnant because the app would have indicated to her that she is in a safe period and that she can have sexual intercourse in peace, because she will not get pregnant. “And then there's the issue of accountability. The issue is not that they don't find information, the issue is how credible the information is and who takes responsibility for the information they find. And who takes responsibility for how they handle information. That you're told – relax, there's no problem – and you're in those 1-2% situations where there really could be a problem.”signals the doctor.
Young people understand quite little what are the limits of applications of this type and that they cannot represent, in any case, a medical recommendation, and the same happens in the case of many adults, the doctor emphasizes.
The myths that try every generation
Young people today, like so many generations before them, have the same beliefs when it comes to intimate life. Most frequently, says Dr. Ucenic, he encounters the conviction, in the case of those who have unprotected sex, that “it just doesn't happen to me”. “It's the most common myth. Anything in this world
From the discussions he has with the young people, either in writing or face to face, the doctor also found that the relationship with the parents is “heaviest stone”. He realizes when young people ask him a specific question. “They asked me when they should start having sex. And I said – when they can talk openly with their parents about it and when they can go to the doctor and say – I have a problem – in the situation where it comes up,” revealed Dr. Ucenic.
The reaction of young people shows, on the other hand, the lack of sexual education. This lack, says Dr. Ucenic, is also often found among teachers and parents. “It's not just the kids who are uninformed, I'm sorry. Parents and teachers too. They don't know how to approach the subject and they don't know the limits to which they can talk or be involved in topics that have a sexual undertone. And I think what's happening today makes them even more reluctant and withdrawn. I think sex education should be not for students, but for the community – the community of parents and children – and be specific to each individual community, because the requirements are completely different”, draws the doctor's attention.
STUDY Over 80% of teenagers in Moldova do not discuss sex or contraception with their parents
Things must be approached differently depending on the specifics of the community, because in a way you can speak in a high school with high demands, from anywhere in the country, and in a completely different way in a disadvantaged area. “You can't say that it's information that you deliver as a package, a kind of all inclusive, universal measure. It doesn't exist”, reinforces the doctor.
“Very few know what normal means and where sex education should start”
Sex education adapted to each environment and each level of understanding is done in other European states from which we could take and adapt the things that have been proven to work well.
“There are countries where the tradition is very well established and where there are protocols and there is a certain hierarchy in terms of education – when it starts, how it starts and what training does he have (ed. – the one who does it)”. the doctor pointed out. On the other hand, there are also countries like Romania, where there is a desire to do something, in certain situations it is carried through to the end, in others it is stuck at various stages. It happens because sex education in Romania was left on the shoulders of volunteers.
A model effective in other countries cannot be simply taken over and applied to us, says the doctor.
“We cannot translate to Romania the model that exists in Great Britain. It has a lot of bonuses. The same in France. Something should be taken from each side, and I would make a working circle together with psychologists, together with people who can tell us more, sociologists, gynecologists. Let it be a debate in which everyone comes with the professional experience acquired in Romania and with what they have learned along the way. For example, I went to a sexology masterclass now at the beginning of the year and I found it very important that actually there are a lot of adults, there are a lot of doctors who want to treat sexual dysfunction issues, but very little is being done to teach what normal means. And very few know what normal means and where sex education should start from”the doctor emphasized.
Sex education should start from learning what normal means, “because normality is defined by everyone in terms of the quality of sexual life”, added Dr. Ucenic.
The need for sex education is solved today on time, when various specialists are invited to schools. What is needed instead is a national resource, believes Dr. Elena Ucenic, which can be provided by the previously mentioned work circle.
“Unfortunately, everyone relies heavily on volunteerism when it comes to sex education. Who should do it? Family doctors? Can they still, do they still have resources? Gynecologists? Can they still want? “the doctor showed us where we are. Above all, in many schools in Romania, they are still struggling with the parents' refusal to let the information reach the children.
“I find this very sad, because parents have the right to refuse. I don't want sex education, but that child who is 12 years old or 13 years old or 14 years old is walking on the street. Girls look a certain way in the world we live in. We live in a hyperestrogenized society and 12-13 year old girls look like 16-17 year old girls, 18 year old girls once upon a time. They too are subjected to constant bullying. I don't just walk down the street where there are polite people and people who don't comment and don't say anything inappropriate to them. It seems to me that this is the thing that parents do not understand”the doctor pointed out that sex education actually means much more than some parents imagine.
Half of Romania's young people have sexual relations before the age of 17. Sex education is done on the Internet
Dr. Ucenic indicated a solution for this problem as well, suggesting that each school should first of all find out the parents' opinion, depending on which to adapt its offer.
“I think that every school could do a program where, at the beginning of the year, they do a survey, why not, and find out where they stand and what is the opinion of parents, students and teachers vis-à-vis education. There should be a guide from the school in which the elements that matter – vis-a-vis health, vis-a-vis sexual education – and in which it says: There should be an awareness for parents, and for children, and for teachers that there is a common language, that there is a place where you can ask, that there is a person you can ask when problems arise”indicated the doctor.
The surprise was, the doctor also mentioned, that in the discussions with the students, in schools, they do not raise questions related to sex, but express their concern that they are walking on the street, someone is attacking them and they do not know how to proceed in such a situation. Or that there are situations in which they are afraid to be alone in class with certain teachers, or they are afraid to report abuse by an employee of the MAI.
“what's going on Who is he talking to? How do we talk about sex education? How about sex education in state structures? How do we talk about sex education among those who should make the decision to do sex education? Who are we talking to? Who takes the problem into his hands and says – yes, I take responsibility for whether sex education or health education is done or not – because after all it is health education. It's a challenge to talk normally about sex education”the doctor concluded.
